White Horse: April 2010

BDAYS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO CATS!

FAITH

get good grades for NLEVEL AND OLEVEL

have a boyfriend like DAVID ARCHULETA.or DAVID ARCHULETA ALONE!haha

go to nashville recording studios to make my CD and make music videos.

act with jim carrey in just one movie only.

sing infront of thousand of people.

THE END

WHY

she may be just a amath teacher in my life.but she help me alot in my life.
Like i never ever get above 4marks for any amath exam since sec3.
but now A1.
and she stay back,when i need her help.
she told me not to give up.
she takes care of me.
oh god hear my prayers and see the tears in my eyes and her tears in her eyes.
pls, I beg you.pls help her.pls do.i trust you oh god.you know i do. pls i pray that my amath teacher has nothing wrong ,wont grow blind.
oh i pray that God jesus christ,will help my amath teacher.oh pls help this kind teacher.oh god.pls! she needs you.she still has kid.
i dont wish to change amath teacher.
i pray that she dont grow blind and i hope that
things go well.

FIGHT

is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again...even though every time you've tried before,you've lost.its to have faith that someday things will change.

FRIENDSHIP

i can feel this.This things inside me
this friendship we have is fading really fast.
it seems our friendship last time was good.
but now after i 'retain'.things has change.
we go out together everyweek.
we call each other to talk about lots of stuff for hours and hours.
til our parent nag at us.
And i even forgive you,that you forget my birthday for 3 times in a row.
even my other friends still rmbr my bday.but
in fact when the day after my birthday,i told you that my birthday was yesterday
you say nothing.you didnt even wish me.but i still forgive you.

we laugh real hard when,we saw something funny.
we do things together.

now you dont call me on phone anymore as what you use too last time.
you dont ask me out for a very long time.
you seem to be away from me,when i want to talk to you.
you always give me a fake smile when i see you.
you always cancel the outing that we have,ever since.
and i rmbr you say that i cant make it at all for this things and that.

it seems like is not you anymore.

i guess,if this is what you want.
i have nothing more to say.
people always say friendship always last long,i say is all a lie.

LIFE

Can i lead a normal life after Nlevel?
like able to go outing with friend.
like able to do what i like.
like able to go youth camp.
like able to attend more stuff in church and other stuff
like able to go to grandma house.(which i only can go after nlevel)
(ps i miss grandma)
like able to stay overnight at my grandma house together
like able to attend my close friends and grandma birthday party.
like able to have spare time for myself
like able to go out with cousin and aunty.
like able to attend my close cousin wedding.(i cant,because is during nlevel period)
(and i know that my cousin thinks i am selfish,but i am sorry.i have to do this.to get what i want.i have to be selfish in some ways.oh pls forgive me.i am sorry)
like able to get back on my Prac lesson
like able to play hide and seek with other kids at the other side.
like able to go back to my piano lesson.
like able to say yes to every outing.
like able to be like other kids,which have no worry
like able to make my parent proud of me for my study//(but fail)
like able to get out for 4 small walls,every day i face alone.
like able not letting my uncle and cousins,school mates looking down at me.

is hard
but i dont even think of it.
i dont even think.
i just wish i can just pass the most easy exam.like nlevel.
but i cant even pass the simple exam.
i have fail before the most SIMPLE EXAM OF ALL!
can you beileve it.
i never ever thought that i could...
nvm.

but i just hope i can pass this year.

is always nlevel this nlevel that.
life is tough
I gave up everything just to study.
i mean EVERYTHING.

hoping to pass my nlevel,is just my wish now.
just hope yeah just hope.
thats all i can think of it now.

just Hope for the better